Winter seems to have finally reared its proverbial head (how cliche of me) and I am NOT okay with it.  True, true…it’s my choice to live and work practically on the Canadian border (literally), but it doesn’t mean I have to enjoy sub-zero temperatures, which is exactly what I experienced this morning at 6:15 when getting into my car to go to work.  And, horror of all horrors, my wonderful, warm mittens were nowhere to be found.  As I was already running late and Dave was still sleeping, I couldn’t afford to spend time rummaging around looking for them, so I did the next best thing; I spent time rummaging around for some make-shift mittens in my car.  And boy, did I find some.

Apparently, freezing temps force people to go lengths they may never have even imagined they were capable of.  For what did I find on the floor in the backseat?  Something that on any other day would have annoyed me: a pair of Dave’s dirty work socks.  Why?  I have no freakin’ clue.  Seriously.  Weird.  But…they found their way onto my blue, shaking hands, which is exactly where they stayed for 20 minutes as I drove frantically and shivering up 89.  When I walked into school, I promptly removed my coat, made a cup of coffee, and washed my hands in hot, hot water for several minutes as I stared into the mirror at the barely recognizable face of someone I thought I once knew.

The rest of the day was fairly standard: “Stop talking.  Stop talking.  Stop talking.  Stop talking.  Write a sentence.  Write a sentence.  WRITE ONE FREAKIN’ SENTENCE!”  And some other more noteworthy moments in between.  My redemption:  my students not only like my clothes, but they acknowledge that I’m a teacher who “actually probably has a life.”  SCORE!

Although it may not be entertaining to most, I have to brag about my students today and how awesomely they rocked thesis workshop.   If this eliminates (or at least diminishes) the probability of having to read one more thesis statement like “Huck Finn has important themes,” or “Huck Finn is kind of a brat, and slavery is wrong,” it will all be worth it!  Here’s hoping.

And one more thing:  apparently saying “Huck ‘n Jim” really fast is HILARIOUS to 17-year-olds!  So is saying that Huck and Jim were “just hangin’ out on the raft.”  Every day at work is a new day of discovering sexual innuendos and the astonishingly random and otherwise mundane words and phrases that my students seem capable of turning into the most perverted of intentions.  Similar to middle school when someone couldn’t say “do it” without bursting into a round of hysterics, but at least they’re a bit cleverer than that, I guess.  A for effort!  It’s actually given me a plethora of good examples to help explain double entendres and insinuation.  HaHA!

PLEASE NOTE:  Never talk about the “Alaskan Bush”, “our next big unit”, or tell students to “wrap it up” EVER!

New realization: as a student, I always felt like we were getting away with something when we watched a movie in class.  Movies = huge break and even bigger relief as a teacher.  Harsh reality: Can’t get away with showing movies unless there’s a legitimate reason (End of Greek mythology = two class periods to show Percy Jackson.  Sweet justice.)

Am now debating rewriting/planning my curriculum around texts with awesome film versions.  Hmmm…

Gripe of the week:  student emails.  It was an awful, horrible, terrible mistake to tell students to email over the weekend if they had questions regarding their projects (I told them I’d be incredibly disappointed and agitated if they came to class with an excuse as to why their projects weren’t done without having made any attempt to ask for help or clarifying questions first).  These were the emails I received: “Hey don’t think I’ll get project finished, can I just turn in Tuesday?” and “Hey what’s project on?” or “Can’t type paper, no printer” or “Can’t finish project, dead relative over weekend.”  Riiiiiight.  All strangely around 9pm Sunday night.  At least the last emailer made an attempt at a valid excuse.  ”Dead relative” is more convincing then “went to soccer game” or “went to party.  Too tired to finish.”  The “no printer” student certainly had the most solid excuse; clearly not having a printer impedes one’s ability to either email said paper or, GASP, God-forbid, HAND WRITE IT.

Next unit: Email Etiquette; How to Not Come off as a Lazy Douche Bag in Writing.

First Lesson: Spelling; Words you Learned in First Fucking Grade.

Final Exam: Never, EVER, email Ms. B again.  EVER.

Today, though, I felt like a broken record.  ”Ms. B, how many of these words do we have to know?”  ”All 25, that’s why I gave them to you.”  ”Do we have to know all of them?”  ”Yes.”  ”Will the quiz just be on half?”  ”No.  All of the words will be on the quiz, that’s why I gave them to you to study.”  ”Ms. B, when’s the quiz?”  ”Next Friday.”  ”We’re taking a quiz?”  ”When’s the quiz?”  ”We have a quiz?”

Needless to say, I came home today, sat down to read, and woke up two hours later.  I am exhausted, as I should be I guess.  The rising at 5am, getting to work and spending the whole day on my feet running from classroom to classroom (I don’t have my own), offices, student to student, planning, talking all day long…well, by the time I get home in the late afternoon I’m about ready for bed but, of course, the life of a new teacher doesn’t easily allow for coming home with no work (or any teacher I suppose).  It is a welcomed and refreshing kind of exhausted though - I love the school I work at, my colleagues, and my students.  Even the ones who ask the same question over and over, or who don’t follow instructions after you’ve said them five times in five different ways and written them on the board and the handout.  (Seriously though, I can’t stand that.)

I feel happy and grateful to have found a job I enjoy; a job I feel lucky to have and to go to each and every morning.  The challenge and the workload are exhausting and sometimes stressful, but after a week of glorious vacation in Boston this summer and another of waking up late and staying up late, it’s nice to have something to occupy my mind and time.

There’s such a hopeful, excited, and yet fleeting sensation that goes along with the beginning of a new school year, which probably has more to do with the fall, with teaching seniors, and reliving the *last* homecoming game year after year.  With invitations to every soccer and football game so far, I should probably eventually go to one.  I probably should have gone tonight since my current school and my old school were playing each other….but the falling asleep thing…well, you see what it’s done to my Friday night.

But, I do have things to talk about, think about, and care about besides school, like my sister’s wedding!  And my cousin’s wedding! And my birthday!  And the TUNBRIDGE FAIR!  It’s shaping up to be a fabulous fall; Greek mythology, football, college essays, cider, the American Renaissance, half marathons, fairs, weddings, thesis workshops and all.  (And of course, living in B-Town with Dave!) Bring it on!

(And in case you’re wondering, YES; I am still super awkward at times during class. Example: students were reading aloud, mentioned “raising the roof” and I made the awkward hand motion while students just stared at me in awe, pity, and embarrassment.  Also:  Had a student refuse to read the word “hell” in The Crucible today because he doesn’t swear.  Ever.  Even when it’s written in a piece of classic literature and been approved by the teacher. So when he later had to read the word “bitch,” he sighed, mumbled “not another one,” and a female classmate helped him out by taking it upon herself to shout the word so that it echoed into the hallway and throughout the various occupied classrooms.  It was a thrilling, proud moment.)

I am in for a rude awakening, and yet I continue to pretend like it’s weeks and weeks away and I am capable of changing my habits at any moment.  Dave and I said we’re “taking a night off” in celebration of his raise (Dave got a raise, yeah!), but really it’s more like we take three or four days off from running a week, which amounts to a pathetic total of around 10-15 miles a week (HORRIBLE!).  I have to run 13 in one day, and preferably in just a couple of hours.  Siiiigh.  I am such a good procrastinator.  The only problem is that in school I was always able to pull off the fifteen-page paper just hours (sometimes minutes…) before it was due and get an A, but there’s no magicly running a fast, successful half marathon with five minutes of preparation.  When will I learn?

And now I will do five minutes of ab work to abate my slight guilt while staring at my running shoes by the door, as they glare back at me pitifully, loathing my very (not firm) core.

Less than two hours until The Voice – Go Dia!   Yeah, Blake Shelton.  Wooooo.

I felt a bit sad to leave, of course, because I’d been there for a semester and gotten used to, and fond of, my coworkers, students, classroom, and routine.  I really liked all the kids, too.  Even the ones that called me a “bitch” and “Miss Bancunt” (although it took way more effort to like them I’ll admit).  I’ll never understand that one really – I got called a bitch for assigning homework, asking students to sit down, or simply explaining what we’d be doing that day.  You learn not to take it personally, but…perplexing.

Anyway.  It was a really great experience and I’m thankful for it, and now I’m ready to move on.  I’m excited to begin my new full-time position up north, and very ready to live full-time in Burlington with Dave.  Since I’d been working an hour southeast of the Barre-Montpelier area, I spent most nights at home (or my dad’s home), while Dave and half of my stuff stayed in the place he and I pay for.  It will be nice to be there full-time and enjoy summer in Burlington on the lake (ignoring the fact that the beaches are still flooded).

HHS also offered me the chance to mature into teaching before I began my new job.  During my student teaching semester I had the very great fortune of working with a teacher who was fun, brilliant, and most of all understanding.  There were so many things going on during that semester that I really benefited from her motherly ways (having mono, father on deathbed, etc. etc. – essentially psychotic from exhaustion and stress each day), although I relied on them too much, I think, and wasn’t in the driver’s seat like I had to be for the past couple of months.  It has been rewarding getting to school an hour early and staying at least an hour late, being completely in charge of the entire curriculum: planning, implementing, and grading, and bearing the full brunt of the students’ hostility, aggression, angst, excitement, and love.

Teaching, I’m learning very quickly, is a profession which takes quite a bit of time, energy, intellect, and enthusiasm, and does not always earn the return of those things.  This is apparent, not necessarily by the students, but by outside influences on the students who come to school and, when not granted permission to do as they pleased, retorted, “WE PAY YOUR SALARY!”  I simply smiled at the latest student to say this to me and asked, “you do?” while her friend quietly told her to shut up.  I moved on.

It takes a brand of resiliency, as most things do, to end each school day with the energy and will to keep working and show up again tomorrow.  I’m aware that this might never change, and I’m aware that no matter how great (or bad) of a teacher I am, my salary will remain the same. I’m also aware that I’ll be called a bitch again, probably many times, for asking students to sit down and be quiet.  ”Put your phone away.”  ”No, you may not go on facebook.”  ”You’re here for an HOUR!  Take your headphones out.”  ”Stop swearing.”  ”Shakespeare is NOT retarded, and don’t say that word.”  ”Okay, everyone LISTEN this time while I explain it for the TENTH time!” “No, you may not go to buy a snack!” and so on and so forth.  But when a student, who spent all semester being quietly (and sometimes not so quietly) reminded that “Fuck” is not an appropriate word to use in the classroom, tracks me down after class and apologizes for yelling and swearing at me for a full semester, I can smile at the progress made.  She may not have understood Shakespeare, and her writing may not have improved by any drastic measures, but that small showing of self-awareness, growth, and maturity reminds me that there are many ways for students to excel and that I do have a purpose.  Set high standards, expect great things, and wait. And for now, that will help me look forward to September (where I fantasize about a class full of respectful and enthusiastic learners who love me).

PS – I hope it goes without saying that I find the students to be fun, funny, and enjoyable most of the time…and I love witnessing their first encounters with new texts and ideas.  I hope it goes without saying.  But I’m mentioning it just in case.

I’m on vacation from school this week.  It’s been a rainy, crazy weather week but somehow Chris Thile always tends to make it better.

I’m running a new marathon!  This time withOUT Mono (shudder….blechh).  I’ve started training and Dave and my two sisters-in-law will be joining me!  (One of whom is a seasoned marathon runner and I am incredibly nervous to run with!)

Look into if you’re in the area and feel like getting in shape!

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2QuCDt/en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_100_Best_Books_of_All_Time

Do you agree?

There are books on the list I’ve read and admire, some I haven’t read and still admire, and even some I have never heard of, which is embarrassing considering I’m an English major/English teacher and take on the unspoken responsibility of knowing every worthy book ever written, and then some.  Ah, well.  Bucket List!

I am confused, however, about the country listed for Samuel Beckett:  France?  What did I miss here?

I give the film two thumbs up!  I have to admit, I am, in truth, a bit depressing with a hint of the macabre running through my ice cold veins, but I strangely hoped the movie would live up to its model and everyone would die, as in a true tragedy.  Of course, this was an animated feature, rated G, and the majority of the audience was under 12 years old, so I kind of figured it would have a happier ending…and it did!  I was fine with that too.  Everyone lived happily ever after – the Capulets, Montagues, and all lawn ornaments.

Really, though.  The gnome who was supposed to be Mercutio, though I can’t remember his gnome-name (Benny? I know it makes sense that “Benny” would in fact be Benvolio, and perhaps he was, but Tybalt (actually named so in the film) cuts off Benny’s hat making me think that was the scene in which he actually kills him.  Why am I analyzing this?  Fine, Benny was Benvolio), and the bunnies were HILARIOUS!!!!!  I cracked up.  I went with Dave, Maddy, and Ben, and sat there laughing louder than the six-year-old behind me at times.  I have no shame.  It was great.  I loved the Elton John music and the talking Shakespeare statue (voiced by Patrick Stewart, which gave it a more legitimate feel, of course).

I also enjoyed the various Shakespeare references scattered throughout (ex. the warring houses are labeled and “2B” and “Not 2B” and “A weed by any other name is still a weed”).  Very cleverly strewn about in a children/family movie.  AND SO FUNNY!!!  DID I MENTION THE FUNNY???

Nice work, Touchstone.